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Big New Joyless

by Will Boelts

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1.
Harakiri 03:51
i wanna tell it all i wanna be your only one with my head against the wall i'll say it 'til i come undone your harakiri boyfriend spilling my guts across the floor for my master i'd do more your harakiri boyfriend your harakiri boyfriend why pretend we don't have feelings cut the gut and start revealing i want it on the table i wanna know just what you are so baby if you're able just take that knife and make a big deep scar no secrets now now that it's over
2.
since we've got nowhere to run to and the count is raining hellfire in the yard the flesh will soon be falling from our faces and our skeleton hands will reach for one last cigar baby i think it's time we tried to put a pin into this thing and disconnect ourselves from this moderate livestock life and substitute it for something made to sing 'cause there's beauty in life but we're so close to death and man is just a blip on a screen so i'm thinking since we got to be here let's get on through to the dance and disease since what's held us up has been pulled under and the binding that held our pages was pulled apart we'll sink just like a dumbbell and our bones will turn to seashells but we'll go up in flames like beasts inside a barn
3.
Warmth 03:05
these cold winter nights sure affect my peace of mind these silent empty days trying just to feel okay i need some kind of warmth just some human connection someone i can hold real tight how soon will it be before i find somebody i can talk to how long can i wait before i totally collapse inside my brain so if you're tired of hanging out here in the cold all by yourself look to me share some warmth
4.
such a simple habit takes control self deprecation takes it's toll i'll lose my mind but you'll go first i'm finished waiting do your worst i resign myself to the big new joyless it feels like my knees are about to give out the man in the sky controls all my choices like the blade of a guillotine glaring in the sunlight simply overwhelmed but still intact just like a beetle on its back scream at this landscape i hold dear just listen closely and you'll hear
5.
i let the door hit me on my way out hover through the fog and filthy air and just try to settle down but at the moment it's looking like an impossibility i'm not a stand up guy i just play one on tv i take every good thing in my life and i turn it to trash i could try to build my house but it would just burn down 'cause i'm the midas of ash i'm just mowing down roses i'm just mowing down roses looking back now i see many names like those individuals who taught me how to draw flames going from head of the class to a snake in the grass misspelling my religion all the way
6.
she only likes the slow songs 'cause it's easier to cry and she just keeps on swaying 'til her tear ducts have run dry making her pretty face a mess for the boy who took her love smoke it snort it shoot it up sadness is the hardest drug lonely nights at lonely bars chasing tails and crashing cars buckshot eyes and bloodshot lies she takes a drag and laughs until she cries the jukebox took her change and changed her night into a day reminds her of the high school prom where he promised that he'd stay and now
7.
don't treat her like dads treat their daughters don't treat her like brothers treat their sisters don't treat her like sons treat their mothers just tell her there's no other and never let your love die away
8.
Close To God 02:36
every sunday i see believers they make me wonder i beg the question how can you be so close to god how can you be so close to god close in the spirit but not in proximity and a crutch to rely on and a friend to believe in but still there's questions with never an answer and can we be friends when millions still suffer and you've been stabbed in the back so many times it's a wonder that you still give him another chance when it's clearly so one sided and you're feeling so excited and you're wanting to sing for him while trying to dance so you give him all your love and you claim that you're close rest assured that you're protected by the holy ghost then completely disregard the fact that you're burning in hell if you decide that you don't wanna be friends
9.
Slow Bird 06:20
slow bird where you been it's been too long i miss my friend slow bird where'd you go did you forget to take your pills slow bird slow me down again slow bird pick me up again slow bird slow me down again slow bird i'm alone again so peaceful is how i felt with you there i am myself slow bird are you still flying low helping me
10.
Defeat 03:28
she said that every living creature on earth dies alone quit trying to hold on so tight i'm gone long gone like a turkey in the corn species of animal brought back alive interesting similarity in physical characteristics to human beings in head trunk arms legs hands feet very tiny undeveloped brain comes from primitive planet named earth i don't wanna be alone you already lost it it's gone bud whatever it is whatever you are gone people are alike everywhere when you see me again it won't be me

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Album cover by Nick Hall

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released January 24, 2015

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Will Boelts Cedar Falls, Iowa

Conveniencecore™

Spotify: open.spotify.com/artist/3q1DWNaadRR7K0BRsSHLMe

YouTube: www.youtube.com/channel/UClroZN1g6WPt8IR94gFaxqQ

Contact me at
boeltsw@uni.edu
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